In ‘Where’s the Black Lady?’ everyone scrambles to save Liv (Kerry Washington), including Liv.
Let’s bitch it out…
Well it’s official. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again….Fitz (Tony Goldwyn) is the Worst. President. Ever. When his girlfriend is kidnapped, he decides to make the ultimate selfish decision and sacrifice countless American soldiers (well, 33 at last count) for Liv’s life by starting an unnecessary war in fictitious West Angola.
But let’s back up a bit…Liv is captured and making the proof of life video. In the video she tells Fitz if he does not declare war, she will be killed. And because she’s Liv, she’s smart enough to ask for a glass of water so her captor’s reflection would be on tape.
Turns out, mastermind VP Andrew (Jon Tenney) has got quite the entourage. As part of his plan to declare war, he has enlisted the support of Secret Service agents and other White House staff, leaving Fitz a captive in his own home. Here’s where I am confused. What is Andrew’s plan? If his main objective is to control the White House and become President, this seems like a really complicated way to do it. Since apparently all of the White House is in on this conspiracy, can’t he just slip poison into Fitz’s food and be done with it? Keeping someone’s mistress captive for three years seems like a logistically difficult way to get what you want. And why did large groups of secret service agents sworn to protect POTUS decide to defect? Is Andrew that charismatic?
Back to the issue at hand: Fitz meets with Jake (Scott Foley) to share the video. How much fan fiction do you think will be created thanks to the scene of the two of them in Liv’s bedroom? Jake and the remainder of OPA start tracking down leads from the video which happens to coincide with an adorable old lady who keeps showing up to OPA asking “where’s that black lady?” You see, she can’t get in touch with her friend Lois aka Liv’s neighbor. Just the break our team needs! When they show up at Lois’s apartment, they discover the kidnapping team worked from there and manage to track the computer to our captors.
Meanwhile, over in B613 territory, Huck (Guillermo Diaz) is also working to find Liv. Naturally this means going all “Huck” on Liz North (Portia de Rossi). Is there anything scarier than Huck laying next to your sleeping daughter? DEFINITELY NOT. Just knowing he’d be there, I got chills. In a gross moment, Huck flays Liz’s back to force her to help find Liv. Surprisingly, she turns to Mellie (Bellamy Young), who, as usual, kicks butt by seducing Andrew and stealing his cell phones to help the team pinpoint where Liv’s captor is.
However, when they arrive to save Liv, it’s all for naught. She’s not there. Liv being Liv, she didn’t just sit around and wait to be rescued. While everyone’s trying to free her, Liv has been manipulating Ian (Jason Butler Harner) into selling her on the open market to the highest bidder because whoever has Liv controls the most powerful man in the free world. In the end we see Liv on an airplane heading to God only knows where.
I hope she has a long term plan, but even if this is just to buy time so she can get some shampoo and new clothes, it is totally worth it.
- Everything was so much better when Lauren was POTUS’s Secretary. Where’s Lauren?
- I love that Fitz and Mellie still trust each other during crises. But why did Mellie encourage Fitz to choose love over country?
- Mellie: “I talked to a couple of schools today about volunteerism, giving back to the community…no one cared, including me.”
What did you think of ‘Where’s the Black Lady?’ Are you looking forward to the international bidding contest for Liv? Are you as annoyed with Fitz as I am? Sound off below!
Scandal airs Thursdays at 9pm EST on ABC. See you next week for the billion dollar bidding war. Don’t forget your bidding paddle!