Is she in or is she out? Emily (Emily VanCamp) makes the call about whether or not to pursue her REVENGE! agenda against the Graysons as the amnesia ruse comes to an end.
Let’s bitch it out…
As soon as we learn that Em’s lady parts were damaged in the shooting, it’s clear what decision she will make (’cause really…how are you going to walk away from that?). Admittedly before this moment, I honestly began to wonder if Revenge had planned something really audacious to rock the boat leading into its remaining S3 episodes. I envisioned something like a time jump ala Lost or Desperate Housewives (both ABC shows so there’s precedent). Think about it: Emily gives up her plans to take down the Graysons and then we skip three years into the future (or two. Or five. Whatever floats your boat). Some new conflict brings everyone back into proximity and the revenge starts anew, possibly with the tables turned and the Graysons pursuing Emily (a scenario I remember being tossed around by fans in the first year when the concept seemed less sustainable).
Alas it’s not to be. I’m definitely intrigued by Emily’s semi-reveal as she essentially cops to be a stalker who loves Daniel (Josh Bowman) and the lifestyle enough to stay in an unhappy marriage. It’s kind of fun because the parallels between Victoria (Madeleine Stowe) and Emily are clearer than ever (Side Note: the final deal-brokering scene is delicious, despite Vic’s downgraded throne chair). When you think about it a little more, though, this is little more than a solidification of status quo: Victoria doesn’t trust Emily farther than she can throw an infinity box, Daniel is miserable and whiny/murderous and Emily is still playing covert-ops trying to take the family down from the inside.
The biggest difference is that she’s down an ally as her decision to stay the course costs her Aiden (Barry Sloane). The depth of his despair is clearly evident when he immediately hops in the sack with nurse/ex-lovah, Nico (Stephanie Jacobsen). Let’s talk about Nico. I love Jacobsen, but man this is a thankless role. Not only is Nico abrasive and hot-headed (punching Emily when she was shot is not going to win her any fans), but the whole “Takeda’s daughter here for revenge” plotline is totally groan worthy. The only mildly surprising development in this paint-by-numbers development is that Aiden actually slept with her so early on. Guess he’s not overly heartbroken by his break-up with Emily.
One break-up I’m happy to see is Nolan (Gabriel Mann) and Patrick (Justin Hartley). The writers have gone back to this well too often. Playing Patrick as a patsy between Nolan and Victoria is one (uninteresting) thing, but to suggest that he’s capable of being a double agent is questionable. After all, this is a guy who makes impassioned speeches about things no one cares about (this week it’s about knowing more about his past – yawn). At this point it feels like we’ve seen little more than Patrick alternating which master to hitch his loyalties to, so hopefully now that Nolan has fed Victoria the faux-infinity box via Patrick this can all come to an end. Hartley should either be shipped off or given something new to do because the character is a bore (Side Note: are we really meant to believe that nothing happens after Patrick smacks Nolan in the head with a piece of firewood? That’s assault, people!)
- The beauty about the time jump proposal I outline above is the chance to simply write out any characters who are no longer needed. Case in point: Charlotte (Christa B. Allen), whose role on the show is little more than that of a glorified extra. She delivers Jack and Carl (hey new baby!) to Emily at the Graysons and then butts in two minutes to ask Jack to leave. She’s essentially just a messenger at this point so WHY IS SHE ON THIS SHOW? My fantasy flash forward: in two years Charlotte is dead, her life tragically cut short in a freak stampede at a Boxing Day sale for discounted designer fashions. Or in five years she has eight children, is morbidly obese and lives with exiled Ashley in New Jersey where they have zany adventures every Friday night. The possibilities (in which we no longer see her) are endless!
- Ditto Sara (Annabelle Stephenson). Why is she still on our screens? I thought we were done with her, so why does old Lemur eyes keep coming back?!
- Poor Jack (Nick Wechsler). He’s just not getting the hang of this spy stuff, is he? Thinking he can admit the truth to Margaux (Karine Varnasse) only earns him a boatload of trouble when Em decides to spin the lie that Voulez would have scooped. I’m surprised that Margaux let him off the hook that easily, all things considered. Though her journalistic/entrepreneurial ethic is in question when she is a) talked into the story by Daniel and b) talked out of the story by Jack. I’m fairly certain any kind of legitimate journalist would have told both men to eff off
- Why is Conrad (Henry Cznery) hijacking the Voulez cover? This is probably the only truly unknown element in an episode filled with a whole lotta obviousness.
- Finally, always good to see Bianca (Conor Leslie), the Grayson’s maid, getting a bit of air time. If this was Lifetime she would be the star of the show!
- Emily (surveying Nolan’s candy striper outfit): “Or maybe this is your excuse to purchase a new jacket?”
- Conrad (to Emily): “You’ve already taken two bullets to the stomach. Moving forward, you may want to watch your back.” That’s pretty witty for Conrad
Over to you: if the series jumped forward, where would you like to see it pick up? What would Charlotte’s fate be? Were you surprised that Nolan and Em gave Victoria a faux-infinity box? Could Aiden and Nico’s storyline be more obvious? Should Patrick do something new? Comment away below
Revenge airs Sundays at 9pm EST on ABC. Come back next week as things apparently get really sour between Daniel and Emily (his quip is awesome – and terrible!)