Give yourself a pat on the back: you’ve made it to the last month of 2015 without eating your feelings, killing your boss or shipping off your loved ones to the North Pole. We’ve got a bunch of new and exciting features to reward you with, including the fifth annual Bitch Awards!
Let’s bitch it out…
Welcome to December. This is the month we spend all year waiting for; a month filled with holidays, gifts, and time with loved ones. All of the good stuff. Oh, it’s also the period of time when most conventional TV goes on hiatus, when cinemas are flooded with Oscar contenders and seasonal specials fill the airwaves. To help you navigate, here’s what our holiday schedule looks like. After all, the only thing we want for Christmas, is you…<barf>
Let’s start off with our regular coverage:
- Blood & Oil S1 (9pm EST, ABC) – Series Finale December 13
- The Leftovers S2 (9pm EST, HBO) – Season Finale December 6
- Tuesdays: iZombie S2 (9pm EST, The CW) – Fall Finale December 8
- America’s Next Top Model C22 (9pm EST, The CW) – Series finale December 4
- Grimm S5 (9pm EST, NBC) – Fall Finale Dec 11
- Ash vs Evil Dead S1 (9pm EST, STARZ) – Continues throughout December
- Other: Marvel’s Jessica Jones S1 (Netflix – Tues/Thurs) – Coverage ends Dec 10
And now on with the show! Here’s what’s new for December.
Feature: Made-For-TV Christmas Movies BINGO
What is it? The holidays just wouldn’t be the same without a crapton of truly atrocious made-for-TV holiday films. To get you into the spirit, we’re going to watch and review one Lifetime/Hallmark film each week using our handy BINGO card, which will encourage you to
avoid these movies at all costs watch these movies yourself!
Why should you care? Simply put these films are hilarious
ly awful and should be watched by no one everyone, but since there are thousands of them, you’ll need help narrowing the list down. So watch along with us and comment on your favourites as we go!
Who’s writing? cinephilactic is hitting the nog hard to get through this assignment
When’s it going up? Every Friday in December
- Dec 4: Naughty and Nice (2014)
- Dec 11: Best Christmas Party Ever (2014)
- Dec 18: All About Christmas Eve (2012)
Feature: Rumour Has It… (December 2015)
What is it? Each month we’re surveying pop culture enthusiasts for their answer to an open-ended question from our patented* question-generating water cooler. Here’s this month’s question:
Which TV show is killing it right now?
We figured that the answer can help guide you as you plan your holiday TV marathon/binge/purge (What else are you planning to do: talk to your relatives or go outside?)
*There is no actual patent…or water cooler.
Why should you care? Many of our survey respondents are not regular contributors, so you’ll get a sense of what fellow readers are watching, including series that we may not be covering.
Who’s writing? December’s panel is comprised of Carrianne, Emily, Natasha and Valerie
When’s it going up? Monday, Dec 7
TV Reviews: Transparent S2
What is it? The much anticipated return of TV’s most dysfunctional family, the Pfeffermans, who are back for a second season of new adventures and emotional turmoil.
Why should you care? Aside from the fact that S1 was the best series of 2014, Transparent is bolstering its ranks with ah-mah-zing guest stars like Angelica Huston, Cherry Jones as well as returning guest stars Kathryn Hahn, Tig Notaro, Rob Huebel, Carrie Brownstein, Alexandra Billings, Bradley Whitford, Melora Hardin and Michaela Watkins.
Who’s writing? cinephilactic is eager to return to Moira and the others
When’s it going up? The whole 10 episodes go live Friday, Dec 11. The review of 2×01 will go up Dec 12, followed by a binge review of the rest of the season on Saturday, Dec 19.
Feature: Bitch Awards – Best Music of 2015
What is it? The fifth (!) annual countdown of the best (and worst) entertainment of the year kicks off (once again) with a special guest column by former reviewer yellowwait.
Why should you care? We don’t cover music very often, so this is your one chance to figure out what music you should have already purchased and been listening to for the last twelve months.
Who’s covering it? yellowwait breaks down the year.
When’s it going up? Monday, Dec 14
Feature: The Legacy of Star Wars’ Score
What is it? In celebration of the release of Star Wars 7 (aka the one with the lens flares), we’re looking at the legacy of the original film in relation to modern film scores, as well as how 19th-century music forms the backbone for science-fiction fantasy films.
Why should you care? As part of our new Features section, we’re expanding our coverage to include longer pieces that provide more in-depth critical analysis. Plus, what better way to celebrate The Force Awakens?
Who’s writing? harrisonfantastic returns to put his encyclopedic knowledge of film scores to good use
When’s it going up? Saturday, Dec 19
Feature: Bitch Awards 2015
What is it? As previously mentioned, we’re closing out 2015 with our annual countdown of the best (and worst) films and TV of the year.
- Check out the 2014 TV / Film list here
- Check out the 2013 TV / Film list here
- Check out the 2012 TV/ Film list here
- Check out the 2011 TV / Film list here
Why should you care? It’s our fifth anniversary! Plus this is a great way to identify all of the films and TV that you should spend the holidays catching up on instead of hanging around with loved ones or braving the crowds on boxing day.
Who’s covering it? cinephilactic has been preparing his list for weeks (ok, days).
When’s it going up?
- TV: Monday, Dec 20 – Friday, Dec 25
- Films: Monday, Dec 27 – Friday, Jan 1
That’s it for us. What are you marathoning, binging or straight up just watching over the holidays? What films will pull you out of your turkey coma and into the theatres for? And what do you hope makes it onto the Bitch Awards list this year? Sound off below.